Tuesday, December 13, 2011

Hello again. Just me here. I am on lunch today and the day has gone somewhat fast. I had a really bad night last night. I called my mom and spoke to her to see how she was doing. It was great hearing her. I needed to call her to hear her voice. Does that sound silly or what? After I got off the phone, I cried. I miss her so much. The nights are the worst for me, because she calls me when I get home from work, and then usually toward s the end of the night. Every day, I expect her call. And now I don’t get that. It makes me sad and makes me cry.  Also, after I talked to her all I could think about was her. I went to bed dreaming about her there and so forth. Then I woke up in a cold sweat, so I don’t know. It was a rough night.

I was also reading this book about child abuse. I finally finished it. Mind you whenever I picked it up I felt like throwing up. I told my daughter a bit about it. It is hard to explain to your 14 year old child that there are really sick people out there. And the sad part is, they are family. So the book I read was abouat two girls that were sexually and physically abused by their mother, their step father, his mom and dad and the mother’s dad. I was appalled!!! How could anyone at any point take advantage of a child! Why would you hurt such a precious thing. I looked at my daughter and all I can see is her beautiful blue eyes and her smile. Then she asked me what if someone hurt me, what would you do. I told her I would kill them. I said they better pray to god they don’t even look at you. She laughed, and deep down inside I was serious. I can’t imagine anyone taking advantage of my child. I would probably kill that person with my own hands. I told her what the book was about and what the sentences were for those people. She said that is sick and they deserve more than that. I said I know. I said you never know what people are living like behind closed doors. Then I told her, you think your life is bad because I get you to study, there are kids out there much worse off then you. And it is true.

So I think that also affected my sleep a bit too. So that was my night.

My child on the other hand didn’t fight or argue with me. Thank goodness. Another day of happiness. For now (only because I will have to have a tlak to her about school today…someone was bad…).

So, I got some responses to my ladies night this Saturday. Yeah!! I got one no, which sucks, because she is a really awesome friend of mine. And I did get two yeses. So we are on our way to planning a fun night!! Now to think of a something to make, and something to buy and something to do. I usually don’t decorate for ladies night. But I will have to start to clean up a bit. Maybe even put up the Christmas tree. I said I would this pasted Sunday, but never did. Was thinking of doing it yesterday, but my child was busy doing homework. And today I know is out of the question.

Also, I didn’t end up going to the gym. We are having some trust issues with our child, so my boyfriend asked me if I can postpone it till he is off next week. I told him sure, I can do that. Mild sacrifice to make our family a better one.

So yeah, that or I didn’t really want to work out anyways! No, just kidding. I really did. But that is ok, I can do stuff at home as well. Just need to get motivated.

Well I am off to readying this other book, which yet again, I know I should be.

Have a good lunch and let me know your opinions on my sick disgusting book I just red.

Talk to you all tomorrow!!

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